It Takes Patience
Chapter 47: Petty Projections
I woke up around seven twenty. I slept in shifts because every time I would get into a dream state of sleep, my mind went to what I did and apparently what I said to Peyton. The only thing that calmed me was looking at Harry while he slept.
He almost looked like a child. His hair was in a mess of curls all over his head and he breathed lightly through his slightly parted pink lips. He slept on his back and his left arm was above his head bent at the elbow while his right rested on his stomach. I found myself running my fingers through his hair causing him to stir slightly. I pulled my hand away from his head and then began to trace the swallows under his collar bone, play with the cross necklace that lied effortlessly against his chest, and then the butterfly on his beautifully toned abs. As my finger went over the ink lines, Harry’s hand grabbed mine to stop it but his eyes were still closed.
“Yes H.” Harry’s voice was hoarse with sleep making it sound deeper than it already is sending a shiver down my spine.
“That tickles. I liked it better when you rubbed my head.” I grinned at him and put my hand back in his curls massaging his scalp before he spoke again.
“Mmm this is very nice also, but I wasn’t talking about that head.” Harry peeked at me, opening one of his eyes laughing at the expression on my face.
“Harry!” As I went to move my hand away from him all together he grabbed it and pulled me on top of him while looking at the clock in my room. I tried my hardest to ignore the fact that his morning wood was pressing into my stomach but it was so difficult. I feel like he’s doing this to me on purpose.
“Why are we up so early? I was sleeping so nicely.” Harry yawned and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes making me feel bad for waking him up. He looks so tired so often and I hated it that I disturbed what seemed to be a good rest for him.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. I just wasn’t sleeping all that great. You’re so cute when you sleep by the way.” Harry lifted an eyebrow and mumbled a ‘thanks’ before he kissed me on the lips. H. grabbed either side of my hips before breaking the kiss causing me to pout slightly.
“Why didn’t you sleep well?” Harry tightened his grip on my sides causing a sigh to escape my lips. A wave of dread washed over me. I had half a mind to tell him what happened and how sorry I was, but the smarter half of me came up with a lie.
“I was excited because you’re here. I kept waking up to see if I was dreaming it, but I’m not, you’re here with me and I love you.” A slight grin appeared on Harry’s face before I kissed him.
The kiss got passionate all too quickly and I ended up completely topless and rubbing Harry’s bulge over the covers causing him to groan into my mouth. Harry’s hand slid up my chest and pinched my right nipple until it stood erect. He left his hand there, cupping my breast and rubbing it. I know I should stop this but I can’t. I know how much he feels we need time to be around each other in a non-sexual way, but he’s teasing me too. I’m selfish, and regardless to what I did with Peyton, I want Harry more.
“Harry please? Can we? Please? I need you. I know my feelings for you aren’t just based off sex. I love you. Everything about you, and I hate not being able to be close to you. Please?” Harry chuckled at my desperation while biting his bottom lip. He looked up at me searching my eyes again before he spoke, his words barely at a whisper.
“Say it again.”
“I love you. I love you. I love you.” I repeated it over and over as I kissed his face knowing that he needed to hear me say it, but the more I said it the more I wanted to burst into tears. I have to tell him, but I can’t lose him.
His hands left my breast and cupped my face instead bringing my lips to his. I felt my arousal grow and I’m sure that I was drenched in my shorts when he flipped me on the bed so that I was lying under him. He pulled off my bottoms, leaving me naked to the morning air that came into my room through the cracked window. It wasn’t until Harry had me under him that I realized he was already naked and must have slept that way the whole night. I looked down at his length and girth and my hips bucked in anticipation. Harry stopped his assault on my breast so that he could get a condom from my bedside drawer. When he took out the foil packet he threw it to me and laid back on the bed grinning. I’ve seen Harry put it on, but I haven’t ever done it myself.
“Um, I uh, I don’t know how to put it on right.” Harry looked at me and a smirk crept on his lips.
“Come here.” I got closer to Harry on the bed and he sat up. When I opened the packet, Harry grabbed me and made me straddle his legs leaving a gap between us big enough for me to learn. Harry grabbed the hand that had the condom in it in his before he looked up at me and grinned cheekily.
“Like this.” Harry’s voice was husky causing a shiver to go down my spine. He made my fingers pinch the tip of the condom and then roll the rest of it down onto him. When I did, I added my own movements holding him in both of my hands and stroking him lightly along the way. He leaned back onto his arms dropping his head while shutting his eyes and groaning.
“Shit, Reagan!” H. hissed through his teeth and then looked up at me through hooded eyelids. I love it when he uses my name when he’s turned on. Harry sat back up fluttering his eyelids as if he was trying to regain his vision and when his eyes focused back on me he grabbed my hips and pulled me over him. I could feel him position himself at my opening and when he did, I slowly lowered myself onto him. We both gasped at the feeling it brought and as I started to move, I knew I wouldn’t last long.
Somehow this time was different. Our movements were both desperate and controlled at the same time. We kissed more, and our ragged breaths and moans seemed to match each other’s. Harry picked me up flipped our positions on the bed without removing himself from me so that he was now on top. Sweat began to gleam on his skin and he was biting his bottom lip as he rolled his hips pushing himself in and out of me. When we made eye contact, his gaze was almost enough to push me over the edge.
“H-Harry!... Oh fuck!...” I couldn’t even form words into a coherent sentence.
“I know. Me too. Ugh you’re so tight.” H. grunted into my neck and as his breath fanned over my shoulder, I could feel the familiar tightness in my lower abdomen. Harry supported his weight with one arm holding onto the headboard and his movements got faster and more chaotic. I knew he was close too, but he was determined to get me there first. The new position that he was in, caused my hips to tilt upwards allowing Harry to hit my g-spot more often. He slipped his right hand between us and I could feel the rough padding of his middle and ring fingers rubbing ruthlessly on my clit.
“Mmmm FUCK! H.! I’m sooo close!” Harry’s fingers and hips both moved faster and even though I wanted hold out to reach my peak with him, the pressure that built in my stomach released itself. I felt light headed, my legs shook and I’m sure Harry’s back and sides will have red welts on them, if not blood from broken skin. It was the most intense orgasm that I’ve had yet. I came panting curses and saying Harry’s name and shortly after I could feel H.’s body go rigid. A string of profanities left his mouth before he spilled into the condom and his elbows gave out. He rested on them so that he didn’t put too much pressure on me.
“I love you H.” I could feel Harry smile against my neck as he nuzzled there before kissing my collar bone and removing himself from me. He discarded himself of the condom, and then kissed me again before pulling me into a sitting position.
“What? I don’t feel like moving. I don’t think I can. I still feel too weak.” Harry chuckled and glanced over me. I was still naked and so was he, but he is so much more confident in his body than I am. I pulled my comforter over me before he frowned.
“Come take a shower with me glasses.” There was a devilish look in his eyes and he was already getting hard again. I don’t think I can keep up.
“No H. It would probably be safer if we showered separate for now. My lower half would appreciate it.” Harry smirked at me before he left out of the bedroom and into the bathroom.
The indicator light on both of our I phone’s was lighting up and as I picked up my phone, I was tempted to pick up Harry’s. He hasn’t given me any reason not to trust him and I know that my curiosity is eating away at me because I’m the one at fault here, not him. I decided against snooping through his things even though everything in me wanted to and checked my messages instead. They were all from Peyton. A bad taste rose in my mouth and I deleted all six messages I got from him once again without reading what they had to say.
I’m a horrible person. Peyton is a good guy and I don’t dislike him for what happened, but thinking about him makes me dislike myself. Every time I think about the situation for too long a lump forms in my throat and I have to quickly get myself out of my depressed state before Harry comes back in the room.
“What are you grinning at?” He had picked up his phone and both of his dimples were showing. He looked so adorable and suggestive as water droplets dripped from his hair, to his chest, down his torso and to his happy trail before ending at the towel. He opens his eyes slightly wider than they already are before he responded.
“Nothing. You’re so damn nosey... What do you want to do until five?” Harry’s grin got smaller but never left his lips as he looked at his phone and chuckled while responding to a text message. I could feel myself become jealous. Who is he texting and why is the conversation so funny?
“I don’t know H.” I was short and snippy with him but I couldn’t help myself. I don’t know what I would do if he was talking and laughing with another girl. The thought of it makes me furious, but what if he was? We still aren’t officially dating. He hasn’t even asked me to be his yet. At least Peyton did that. Harry looked at me with a raised eyebrow before he looked back down at his phone.
“What’s wrong now? You’re so fucking moody. You make my mood go to shit when you get all bitchy.” His eyebrows were now furrowed, but he was still texting.
“If you’re going to insult me, at least have the decency to look at me while you do it. Is the message damn that important where I can’t have your attention long enough to even be insulted?” Harry’s eyebrows furrowed further and his eye color began to change darker. This time I don’t care if I pissed him off.
“Is that what this is about a fucking text? Don’t start this shit with me. You text people all the time, you’re being ridiculous...Again.” Harry put his phone down and began to put on his clothes from last night. He’s right and that annoys me even more. Just because you’re messing with other people doesn’t mean he is. I shook away the thought that bitchy Reagan put into my head. I’m not messing with other people either. It was a mistake.
When Harry puts on his shoes I get out of bed and stop him like I did yesterday.
“I’m sorry H. I’m sorry, don’t leave.” Harry looked at me and I can tell that I messed up his mood.
“You’re such an annoying little brat. I have to go anyway I need to change clothes and take my meds. Maybe you can go hang out with Laurie and get on her nerves. I’ll be back at four thirty to pick you up for my session.” Harry was annoyed and once again I feel like an ass. But before he left, he pulled me into a hug and gave me the smallest kiss on the forehead shocking me by his actions.
“You agitate me so much. It drives me crazy.” He whispered and glared at me slightly before he let me go and left the apartment. If only he knew how crazy he drives me.
It’s possible that Reagan has more mood swings than me now days and I still go through at least three every two hours. I had to leave before mine got too out of hand and overpowered hers. The last eleven hours were good and the last thing I wanted to do was ruin them by going off on her. Even though she’s kind of cute when she’s angry....Maybe we should both get extremely furious and have angry sex? That would be more than interesting. This morning was interesting. There was something different about it, about her. We were so in sync with each other and it was as if we knew exactly what the other wanted. I definitely feel something for glasses, more than just fancying her that is.
She annoys the hell out of me and gets under my skin like no other bird has ever done before, but I don’t necessarily mind it. Sometimes I provoke it. When she gets angry with me a spark ignites inside me and when she tells me she loves me my heart races ten times faster. Even the first time she said it, though I was sure then that it was because she was horny and was happy to be getting fucked. I don’t want to tell her I love her just because she told me. I want it to be genuine. I’m pulled out of my thoughts when my phone vibrates against my hip. I hop out of the car when I pull into my front drive and respond to the text Louis sent me when I was at Reagan’s as I walk into the house.
Well you better have shagged someone last night is all I’m saying....Your mum was on mine and Zayn’s ass.
Haha! No... I told you I haven’t, in a long time.
And if you’re not lying then that’s sad and I feel sorry for you because you’re backed up. HA! You’ve been jerkin your gherkin. That right arm could probably take out a boxer!
Haha! You stupid fool!...There’s someone but I don’t know. I don’t know if I should tell you :p
Can I guess it? If I guess it right then say so if not then I’ll leave it alone.
I don’t know if this is a good idea, but I want to tell someone about Reagan and Louis has been my best mate since I was five.
3 Guesses Louis that’s it...
You’re going to get it wrong.
I cringe at the name. Tamsin is Gemma's best friend who offered to blow me at Gem's grad party. We sort of had a weird sordid history with one another that I'd like to keep in the past.
Grace lives next door. We fooled around once when she came over to get her nephew’s ball out of my back garden.
Last Try Lou.
As Louis kept on throwing names out there I realized how I only care about one person now and he hasn’t said her name yet.
Alice, Ava, Layla, Reagan???
When I read the text I froze not able to respond just staring at the screen. I was sure that he would get it wrong.
It’s one of those isn’t it?! It is! Layla you haven’t seen I’m sure because she moved...Ava and Alice pssh I’m sure that even you couldn’t get that lucky more than once...That leaves Reagan! It makes perfect sense! It’s her isn’t it? I’m a bloody mastermind! You shagged Reagan didn’t you? Admit it! Admit it right now you cheeky devil you!
You cheated! That was more than 3 guesses. I’m not doing this anymore. You’re cornering me.
Evasion! Evasion of the question means yes!
I think I might love her.
I typed the text but I couldn’t bring myself to send it. It was completely an unconscious act. I read and reread it and the more I did, the clearer it became. I love Reagan Stoger.
HI Guys! This is a long chapter for you all. Sorry it took so long to edit, I'm sure I've got some typos in there somewhere still haha! I'll fix them later, but I had to give you guys this chapter tonight! What do you think? Harry finally admits to himself his real feelings for Reagan while hers is eating away at her internally. Two more chapters left to this part of the story! Be sure to leave me comments below (I still desperately need them and love reading them and replying!) and be sure to subscribe and vote if you are enjoying! LOVE YOU FOR READING! Xx :D